Who Are You?

I want to share a quick story with you.

The other day I was chatting with one of our kids after something had happened at school.

I asked him, who are you?

He told me his name.

So I asked him who that is?

(ie: Who is Victoria Farris?)

He listed titles and roles he has.

(ie: coach, mother, business owner)

I said not what you do, who are you?

We talked about how hard life gets sometimes and how strong the temptation is to join with the crowd or react to something upsetting.

But I encouraged him that when we know who we are (and who we aspire to be) we can anchor ourselves in that, especially in the hard moments.

So he made a list of the qualities that he felt aligned with who he is and who he wants to be, then he printed it onto a small sticker to post on his laptop. A reminder.

Next we’re going to decorate something to hang in his room as another reminder.

We all forget who we are sometimes.

And God knows we all have moments where the delight and satisfaction of reacting wins out over our values and who we aspire to be.

But it’s much easier to navigate those moments when we have a clear vision of who we are.

I was so proud of my kiddo, who then invited some of our other kids to participate and create their own lists.

But I also knew that I needed to do the same practice.

It was easy to talk to him about this, but who am I?!

So I did.

And I’d love to share with you.

I am wonder.

I am courageous.

I am healing.

I am kind + compassionate.

I am wise.

I am relentlessly optimistic.

I am a change maker.

The truest thing that I know about myself is that I’ve never quite fit.

I’m not made for a box or a set of rules or roles.

I am curious and deeply trusting in goodness.

I have always seen the potential for goodness in this world.

For justice.

And freedom.

For another way of being, with less suffering.

Which is not to say that I always understand oppression or what freedom really means – my lens is far too limited and privileged for that!

But there is a part deep down inside of me that knows a better world exists. And that part of me is unafraid, which is how I know she’s true.

So when I remember who I am, I remember that I’m meant to change the world, even just in the smallest of ways. What a freaking gift!